The benefits are almost endless
I’m not asking you to wear pearls and bake a pot roast. No, no, no….. (Unless you’re into that.) Family dinner doesn’t have to mean eating a feast with Cousin McCreepy or Drunk Uncle. It doesn’t need to be homemade, or be at a table. Heck, it doesn’t even have to be dinner (family breakfast is just as good!) But the benefits of sitting down for a meal with your kids are numerous.
What else can you do in 30 minutes per day that will improve your kids cardiovascular health, increase self-esteem, improve academic performance, reduce risk of substance abuse, depression, obesity, and teen pregnancy? Nothing I know of!
But you say: I don’t cook… I don’t have a partner….I don’t have any dinner ideas! Girl, I’ve got you covered!
But my kids won’t sit still!
That’s fine!
My son with ADHD won’t stay at the table more than three minutes, and he’s 9!
Don’t expect your kids to stay seated for long amounts of time, it’s just not realistic. Here’s a few tricks to keep their attention depending on age.
Babies
The high chair is your friend! Keep some toys on their tray as well as food. And don’t worry if they throw food on the floor, that’s just how they learn cause and effect. They’re not doing it to piss you off. I promise.
Walking – 5 years
My son used to meander around the house while I tried to shovel bites of food in his mouth with a spoon. Then my pediatrician told me to stop. So, I felt like a failure…. and figured out other ways to keep him at the table.
Family dinner Trick #1: Tokens
Give your child a couple of “tokens.” We used an old keychain and a foreign coin. If she wants to get up from the table she may use her token to leave the table for whatever time you choose. We told my son he could have a three minute break when he was three years old, a four minute break when he was four years old etc. This gave him a quick break to walk around the house or investigate a toy, and then return to the table “when his token was done.” We gave our son 2 tokens per dinner, but you can choose however many you’d like depending on your level of patience.
Family dinner Trick #2: Read to them
I know this sounds annoying, but it works. Especially while you’re waiting for your restaurant food to come. Take turns with your partner if needs be. Shovel some food in your mouth between pages. You’ll likely keep your audience much easier with picture books than the “borrrrrring” stuff you were going to talk about otherwise.
Checkout my list of our favorites!
Family dinner Trick #3: Board games and card games
This is an especially good one at restaurants where you don’t want them leaving the table. (My favorite trick is to have an UNO card deck in my purse at all times.) You’ll be surprised how much they eat when they’re distracted by Monopoly or Scrabble.
Family dinner Trick #4: Car Games
Yup, the same sort of stuff you would do on that long drive to Aunt Mildred’s third wedding. Ask them “What would you rather do? Swim through a pool full of jello or syrup? Ride a dragon or live with a tiger? Read the telephone book or mow the grass with toenail clippers?” Get wild. You’ll get some laughs, and maybe some milk out of some nostrils.
Also try Grandma packed her suitcase, 20 Questions, or The Movie Game.
For the love of $%&@!, don’t give them an iPad.
The point of this entire endeavor is to interact. If your kid is looking at an iPad game while you and your partner talk, (or you scroll on Instagram,) you’re not getting any of the benefits of family dinner. The key is conversation and camaraderie.
I totally understand that sometimes you just want some peace and quiet. I have given my kids my phone at the Olive Garden more times than I can count. But that was before I discovered that they would keep just as busy with a card game of Go Fish, (and they don’t cry when you put the cards back in your purse!)
But I don’t cook!
No worries! A family meal doesn’t have to be a big deal! (More on dinner ideas later.) It can be inside, outside, on the floor, in a makeshift pillow fort….wherever! Again, the important part is togetherness. Once your kids get in the habit of interacting with you and each other over a meal, they will eventually talk to you about things that actually matter. You know, once they stop picking their noses and saying your food choices look like barf.
Here’s some creative family dinner ideas:
- Take a bag of burgers and fries to the local park.
- Eat cereal on the front porch
- Go out to a restaurant! Don’t forget the card games….
- Get a meal service delivery to take the fuss out of cooking.
- Have some friends over and make it a pot luck.
But I’m a single parent!
I hear you! My partner worked out-of state for the past year. It never seemed attractive to make an entire “grown up” dinner, only for my kids to refuse it, and to have never-ending leftovers.
Well, do you have another single-parent friend or relative? I have had many, MANY dinners with my sister and her kids while her husband was working late. You get to feel like it’s “worth it” to make “real” food, and you get some extra camaraderie.
And don’t forget – you don’t have to eat together EVERY single night to reap the benefits. A handful of nights per month can suffice.
Maybe you invite some friends over for Saturday morning eggs and a playdate? Maybe you meet your family for a random Wednesday at the park with a bag of Taco Bell. It shouldn’t feel like torture!
What are the benefits of family dinner, anyway?
According to The Family Dinner Project, benefits of a shared meal include:
- Better academic performance
- Higher self-esteem
- Greater sense of resilience
- Lower risk of substance abuse
- Lower risk of teen pregnancy
- Lower risk of depression
- Lower likelihood of developing eating disorders
- Lower rates of obesity
- Better cardiovascular health in teens
- Bigger vocabulary in preschoolers
- Healthier eating patterns in young adults
Benefits for adults include:
- Better nutrition with more fruits and vegetables and less fast food
- Less dieting
- Increased self-esteem
- Lower risk of depression
But cooking a meal takes too long!
Agreed.
There was a time when I would start dinner prep, and inevitably my newborn baby would start wailing. I would have to drop everything, sit down to nurse him, and 45 minutes later we were all hangry.
I feel like Pinterest boasts “30 minute dinner ideas,” as if that’s something aspirational. Sorry, but I need something that’s ready in 5. Okay, maybe ten minutes max.
Dinner ideas that aren’t a time suck, and won’t break the bank!
- Scrambled eggs and a side of tomato
- Frozen pizza (or delivery) and a side of broccoli (which you can do in the microwave in 5 min.)
- Chicken nuggets and toaster waffles!
- Bag of salad. Add in a sliced tomato for more veggies and some chunks of cheese for protein.
- Beans and rice. Buy ready-made rice and just open a can of beans.
- Burgers from a drive-thru but add a veggie platter from the store (with the ranch in the middle.)
- Cheese quesadilla in the microwave. Crush up an avocado and add garlic salt for some guac (and extra “good” fat.)
- Cereal! Who says dinner has to be hot or fancy?
- Macaroni and cheese with a can of chili mixed in. I told you this wasn’t fancy.
- PBJ sandwiches with a side of sliced apples. Especially good if dinner is going to be a picnic.
You can do this!
Start small.
One family dinner per week.
It could be a bag of burgers over a board game or a pot luck with some friends. Whatever you chose, you’ll start seeing that your kids are easier to talk to, you’re getting closer as a family, and you’re making lasting memories. (For better or worse!)
Now, if we could only find a solution for those pesky dishes…
More resources:
If you do varied or unique things for meals (like a picnic) you’ll make more memories. Checkout our article about memory!
One of my favorite recipe blogs is Mae’s Menu. You’ll find some seriously delicious ideas here!
Check out the Family Dinner Project. and the Dinner Table Project.
This girl has some seriously fun and cheap dinner ideas @Plandy.Mandy.
After dinner, here’s lots of ways to keep kids entertained without screens.
Thanks for visiting ScreenLessPlayMore.com !
