Screen Less Play More podcast Episode 4 is available now!
Tech and relationship expert Ty Tashiro talks about online dating, awkwardness, and what we can do to find true love in this digital age!
I had a fascinating chat with Ty Tashiro about how tech is changing the way we interact with everyone. He is the author of “Awkward: The Science of Why We’re Socially Awkward and Why That’s Awesome,” and “The Science of Happily Ever After: What Really Matters in the Search for True Love.”
Find it now on our website or on Apple Podcasts!
Tech is affecting all of our relationships
- We are all a little awkward! Scientifically there is a spectrum and we are all on it.
- Tech and social media can be great for finding your “tribe” of people, but the healthiest thing is to find those people and then interact in-person.
- Technology isn’t bad by nature, we just need to use it to fuel more in-person interactions.
I don’t think technology is horrible or technology is evil by nature. It can certainly lead to a lot of good things. What I tell young people when I speak to them is just, hey, treat it as though it’s a means to an end. And the end that you’re shooting for is being face to face with people and enjoying those interactions as much as you can.
Ty Tashiro,
author of “Awkward:
The Science of Why We’re Socially Awkward and Why That’s Awesome”
Dating in the digital age
- The rise of online dating has changed relationship dynamics significantly.
- Half of young adults are not interested in dating at all.
- People spend an average of two seconds on dating profiles before swiping.
- Online dating preferences reveal a disparity in what men and women seek.
- User interfaces of dating apps encourage superficial judgments.
- Matching on personality traits does not guarantee long-term satisfaction.
And when I see people swipe left, I think to myself, there was someone who could have been kind, who could have been remarkably emotionally stable, but you don’t know. And so the advice I give, and I think you would find that a lot of behavioral scientists who work at these companies give, is they would say, ‘this is just a means to get face to face with someone in a safe environment. That’s all the app is.’ And I know there can be some nervousness about meeting face to face, but just go to a coffee shop, meet face to face, do the cautionary things you want to do, but minimize the time you’re spending on the app, one, swiping, and then two, to minimize the amount of time you’re spending chatting back and forth. Cause that’s a road to nowhere for the most part. Just go get the hour, two hours, whatever it is, face to face. And then we know from personality studies that in that hour, you will be able to start to glean some sense of emotional stability and kindness and some of these other traits.
ty tashiro
author of “The Science of Happily Ever After:
What Really Matters in the Quest for Enduring Love”
Find more about Ty Tashiro’s work at TyTashiro.com
Learn about our first 3 podcast episodes here or download them here!
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